I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

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Pretty Funny
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I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Pretty Funny » 03 Mar 2019 14:10

Been thinking about this for a while and it's really puzzling me. I know someone from social media who calls herself a radical feminist. She posts articles and links about feminism, male violence, gender-critical feminism etc. The thing that I find perplexing - this person is the kind of woman who wears a lot of make up, has hair and lash extensions, wears revealing clothing AND has very large breast implants. She has had other cosmetic procedures done as well, injections etc. I know that radical feminists come in many shapes and forms, but breast implants?! Not only that, but she constantly posts pictures of herself showing a lot of cleavage. She keeps claiming that she dresses that way and does all those things for herself, not for men.


It's understandable that people want to change or improve their looks. Most people also want to look nice and want to be accepted. But many of her pictures looks like some kind of softcore porn and she receives a lot of comments from men who call her hot, sexy etc. She has a lot of followers and I suppose most of them follow her because of her pictures, not because of the articles she posts.


She admitted that she suffers from BDD. Actually she made a video about that - with her cleavage showing, of course. The video was pretty honest but she didn't mention anything about the possible reasons why she has the disorder.


She complains about the PM's that she receives from strange men. At the same time I can't help thinking that she is desperate for attention and she enjoys all the attention she gets, even the messages that contain pervy talk and so on. This leads me to one thing that I find difficult to express. She has mentioned several times about the street harassment that she has experienced. That is absolutely wrong, but at the same time I feel like saying to her "put some clothes on and stop posting so many pictures". Am I a terrible person for thinking that? The thing is, if you walk outside with your tits out, men are going to look at you and make comments because they are goddamn stupid.


What do you think about this person?

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Peach
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Peach » 03 Mar 2019 20:00

That behaviour doesn't fit in radfem theory.
Seems like she's doing it for the male gaze. She's fulfilling patriarchy's idea of what a woman is.

Pretty Funny
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Pretty Funny » 03 Mar 2019 20:28

That's what I thought too. Her behavior is more compatible with libfem views.

If she did it purely for herself then she would keep it to herself and wouldn't expose her cleavage and buttcrack to the whole world.

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Irina
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Irina » 04 Mar 2019 08:40

She shouldn't be blamed for provoking harrassment, it's a responsibility men never take on. You can be "provoked" to murder someone, but it's still wrong.
Despite that, I think you can absolutely criticize her as a radical feminist for being compliant and men-pleasing. Glorifying femininity is not a part of radical feminism.

Sibyl
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Sibyl » 04 Mar 2019 17:09

Yes, this is her own internalized misogyny and patriarchy at work in her colonized thoughts and behavior. At the same time, we as radfems need to reach out to these women carefully. We're all trying to survive the same poisonous patriarchy. Your friend does sound like a tough but to crack. Maybe posting some articles about beauty practices and the way they feed attitudes of objectification?
Most women I know feel like outlaws. - Marilyn French

Lesbian
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Lesbian » 05 Mar 2019 01:59

If you’ve never met this person in real life, is it possible they are a troll?
Anyone can find sexy pictures to post...unless you’ve met them, you don’t even know if the poster is the same as the person in the picture.☹️

Pretty Funny
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Pretty Funny » 05 Mar 2019 13:10

Irina wrote:
04 Mar 2019 08:40
She shouldn't be blamed for provoking harrassment, it's a responsibility men never take on. You can be "provoked" to murder someone, but it's still wrong.
I know she shouldn't be blamed. That's why I asked "am I a terrible person for thinking that?" Her attention-seeking behavior seems really odd: on one hand she keeps complaining about the pervy messages that men send her, but on the other hand it seems that she enjoys all the attention, even the harassment. I can't explain it otherwise. All her accounts are public and she is pretty open about her life in general.

Pretty Funny
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Pretty Funny » 05 Mar 2019 13:13

Sibyl wrote:
04 Mar 2019 17:09
Yes, this is her own internalized misogyny and patriarchy at work in her colonized thoughts and behavior. At the same time, we as radfems need to reach out to these women carefully. We're all trying to survive the same poisonous patriarchy. Your friend does sound like a tough but to crack. Maybe posting some articles about beauty practices and the way they feed attitudes of objectification?
She's not my friend. We were on the same forum years ago.

I know some people have criticized her revealing selfies, but she just responds in an arrogant manner, something along the lines of "I just like to dress like this and I'm doing it for myself blah blah."

Sibyl
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Sibyl » 06 Mar 2019 20:18

Maybe one of the things we need to address is that in a society where women's desirability, based solely on beauty, is not only the only approval women get, it is the only way we're acknowledged, valued or seen. Giving this up causes emotional and psychological conflict. Maybe we need to acknowledge this to help all of us escape this trap.
Most women I know feel like outlaws. - Marilyn French

beba
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by beba » 16 Mar 2019 21:13

This reminds me of a famous radical feminist in Sweden that has written a book about prostitution and surrogacy. She is hyper-feminine, has operated her breasts and so on. To me it's confusing to see someone so clearly a victim of male porn-culture and take them seriously as radical feminists. Of course I still value her knowledge and ideas but she doesn't make me want to associate with her, I look up to females who try to reject patriarchy wholeheartedly. I guess we could see hyper-feminine radical feminists as mainstream infiltrators that can spread knowledge to the wider public but only to a specific point, because ultimately, whether we want to or not, femininity will always be about subordination and doesn't do anything for female liberation.

Also, I do believe that most females that hyper-sexualize themselves are victims of some kind of sexual abuse and I understand this way of coping with it. But clear-headed females that have healed their trauma and learned to undo some of the social engineering are vital as role-models in male death culture that we all are trapped in.

Pretty Funny
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Re: I don't know what to think about this. Radfem & plastic surgery

Post by Pretty Funny » 23 Mar 2019 13:17

beba wrote:
16 Mar 2019 21:13
This reminds me of a famous radical feminist in Sweden that has written a book about prostitution and surrogacy. She is hyper-feminine, has operated her breasts and so on. To me it's confusing to see someone so clearly a victim of male porn-culture and take them seriously as radical feminists. Of course I still value her knowledge and ideas but she doesn't make me want to associate with her, I look up to females who try to reject patriarchy wholeheartedly. I guess we could see hyper-feminine radical feminists as mainstream infiltrators that can spread knowledge to the wider public but only to a specific point, because ultimately, whether we want to or not, femininity will always be about subordination and doesn't do anything for female liberation.

Also, I do believe that most females that hyper-sexualize themselves are victims of some kind of sexual abuse and I understand this way of coping with it. But clear-headed females that have healed their trauma and learned to undo some of the social engineering are vital as role-models in male death culture that we all are trapped in.
Do you remember the name of this Swedish feminist? It is interesting to me because I'm from Finland myself.

I also have a feeling that the woman I was talking about has some sexual or psychological trauma. She mentioned having BDD and her somewhat unusual upbringing. It's obvious that she has experienced some kind of insecurity in her youth and now she's overcompensating: she keeps talking about her need for "perfection", how hard she works etc. Her obsession with her looks and cosmetic procedures is obviously a part of this.

I keep thinking that she is dependent on the sexual attention she gets from men, even if there are negative and scary undertones. Perhaps it makes her feel important when she gets to complain about the unpleasant messages she gets? I can't explain it otherwise.

In some ways I think that people can do whatever they want with their bodies, but at the same time I think "I cannot take it seriously when this person calls herself a radical feminist". I'm having mixed feelings. Well maybe it's just a different culture (she's a Caribbean living in the US) and her perception of beauty is different from mine.

Thank you for your insightful answers everyone!

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