Labiaplasty is the fastest-growing cosmetic surgery in the world

[Lesbian]

https://www.economist.com/middle-east-a ... in-lebanon

[Peach]

That's so sad. The more women watch porn, the more they want to act and look like porn actresses. It makes women more insecure. This is horrible.

[Sibyl]

Agreed Peach, the pornification of society, even more horrifying because to most people it is invisible, is beyond awful. Objectification and self objectification via social media is terrible for women too and I believe that it is connected to the pornification. As afraid as I am to be invisible as an older woman (and I don't mean sexually invisible, a diminishing of the daily harassment is actually nice, I mean invisible as in no more value to men, I might as well be femicided in their eyes) not being entirely enslaved by the whole desirability thing is nice. It is the younger women I really worry about and desperately want to help. But because we are judged and in many cases are still judging ourselves and each other by misogynist standards, younger women are trained to dismiss our cries of warning.

[Lesbian]

...because we are judged and in many cases are still judging ourselves and each other by misogynist standards, younger women are trained to dismiss our cries of warning.

Yes, this.
As an older woman, I feel that the best way to influence younger women to rethink this is not through warnings, but through being a living example.
Demonstrating to young women that the experience of being an older woman that is not dependent in men can be a good one. Demonstrating no shame about my aging body, and simple comfort in inhabiting that body.

[Irina]

Yes, this.
As an older woman, I feel that the best way to influence younger women to rethink this is not through warnings, but through being a living example.
Demonstrating to young women that the experience of being an older woman that is not dependent in men can be a good one. Demonstrating no shame about my aging body, and simple comfort in inhabiting that body.

You are so right. Older women's bodies are beautiful in their own unique way. Men's bodies are somehow never demonized for ageing or changing with age.

[marzanna]

Personally I found I was able to resolve my self-objectifying behavior as a young woman who grew up on social media (around a decade across platforms), by a) reducing the breadth of my social media presence and b) stopped posting selfies. bc tbh its not anyones business how im looking on any given day on the internet.

Young women are really distressed by the images they see in porn, of surgically cut vulvas/labias. That distress makes women feel distant to their bodies. I found that using a hand mirror to familiarize myself with what my vulva looks like helped me resolve my anxiety surrounding it. It's a process of demystification in a way. The book What is Obscenity?: The Story of a Good For Nothing Artist and her Pussy by Rokudenashiko (Megumi Igarashi) is also really amazing, but I have some issues with the translation re: incorporating transcult language.

[Sibyl]

...because we are judged and in many cases are still judging ourselves and each other by misogynist standards, younger women are trained to dismiss our cries of warning.

Yes, this.
As an older woman, I feel that the best way to influence younger women to rethink this is not through warnings, but through being a living example.
Demonstrating to young women that the experience of being an older woman that is not dependent in men can be a good one. Demonstrating no shame about my aging body, and simple comfort in inhabiting that body.

I'm trying to do this too and not just with the beauty stuff. I'm hoping to show the wisdom that age can bring. But it is uphill work and I'm scared to be an object/commodity that is viewed as entirely useless. I don't care about being sexually less visible. That is a relief even though my own internalized male gaze still operates, I'm more aware of it than ever. I'm worried about the possibility of future femicide for older single women. I think women alone should form little safety groups.

[Lesbian]

... I think women alone should form little safety groups.
[/quote]

I love this idea!!!!